one of my very favorite Bible stories of all time is the story of peter when he realizes that Jesus is on the shore and had commanded them to throw their net over the right side of the boat.
this was after he had denied Jesus three times, right before He was crucified.
i feel the story of peter fishing takes its roots in his denial of Christ.
Jesus predicted it.
peter did it.
and then, Jesus dies.
imagine if you were peter.
imagine if you were any of the disciples.
but peter in particular...
the shame of denying his lord and then thinking that there was no way to even say, "I'm sorry."
i bet he was thinking, wishing, hoping for a second chance.
then fast forward to the shore of the sea of galilee.
this morning as D and i chatted over this bit of scripture the word 'default' kept coming up.
what do you do when everything is different and yet nothing has changed?
your default.
until you figure out the next thing.
and this is what peter and his friends did.
their default.
they went fishing.
taking a wee bit of a detour right here...
have you seen Risen yet?
if not, you so should.
it's about the resurrection but from the point of view of the roman tribune who was tasked with finding the body of Jesus.
and guess where the search takes him?
you guessed it...to the shore of the sea of galilee.
(see...i told you i was a wee bit of a detour...and i didn't give much of the movie away either.
i promise.
it's really THAT good.)
now that we're back to where i left off...
this fishing scene is so good...
you can see them relishing in being together doing what they've always done.
the exhausting work of throwing, rowing, pulling (wash, rinse, repeat)...
and since they hadn't done it in quite some time i bet it was refreshing to be at it again.
have you ever done that?
something that your body knows so well that you don't even need to think about it.
auto-pilot.
and at the end of the night.
there was nothing.
in the dawn tinged light of the morning there's a voice from the shore,
"friends, haven't you any fish?"
"no," they answered.
he said, "throw your net on the right side of the boat and you will find some."
amazingly enough they actually do it!
and that is when john realizes that it was Jesus on the shore.
peter...good old peter.
he wraps his robe about him, jumps into the water, and runs to Jesus.
my heart always warms at this.
i've tried so many times to wrap words around the emotion i feel.
and yet they slip away...like fish too little for the net.
to hear His voice!
to touch His skin!
to feel the delight in His eyes!!
my heart swells with delight for Peter.
and to know the depths of the forgiveness only Christ gives...
*deep sigh*
this, my friends, i find deeply satisfying.
but, there's something else.
something new.
something i realized last night...
imagine throwing that net all night.
only to catch nothing.
have you ever had days, weeks, months or even years like that?
all it feels is work, work, work...
set your face like flint...
don't give up...don't give in...fight...fight...fight.
but it's tiring.
it feels life-draining.
and you wonder,
"is this even worth it?"
proverbs 13:12a
hope deferred makes the heart sick
there is story after story of people in the Bible who have done just that.
they sought the Lord.
they did what they were supposed to.
and yet none of it was enough.
and then...something changes...something happens.
and Jesus cries out from the shore,
"throw your net on the right side of the boat and you will find some."
proverbs 13:12b
but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.
could it possibly be that Jesus isn't in our defaults?
that our defaults are comfortable.
here's a thought...one that just came to mind...
for three'ish years they followed Him.
day after day seeing and doing some pretty amazing stuff.
after He dies and rises again He tells the ladies to tell the disciples, "go to galilee".
so off they go, obedient.
and when they get there...there's no Jesus...but there's a boat.
now, i'm not saying that our defaults are wrong, or sinful, or even leading us away from Christ.
quite the opposite actually...because if you really look at it closely He actually LED them to that boat.
i'm thinking it might've been a fantastic object lesson.
do your default...nothing happens.
do what Jesus says and you get the largest haul of your life!
but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life!!
so. amazing.
Jesus is so amazing.
to clarify...i'm not saying do what Jesus says so you get stuff (or money, or fame, etc).
what i'm saying is that when we obey Jesus will confirm it.
we are, sadly, very temporal needy creatures so He often helps us along with actual things.
He is so wonderfully gracious that way!
God has made us to be fishers of people.
for myself, i am often afraid of what that may mean.
so i stand in my boat thinking, "but...what will happen if i throw my net on the right side?"
then i worry it to death.
it's sad.
and pathetic, really.
but sometimes i get it right.
and to feel the Lords approval...it's like sun on my face.
but better.
oh so much better.
makes me want to obey more and more.
and hence this blog.
right...super long now.
please know...i'm not a theologian.
it's just me, my Bible, a journal and the Holy Spirit.
sometimes i run it by D (my husband who was known as big 'd' growing up)...
if there's something you're not sure of or you think i'm just flat wrong...
please be kind.
there's no need to be rude or mean or even a know-it-all.
this is my meagre way of sorting out what he's saying to me.
and now it's time for bed.
may the Lord bless you and keep you.
xo,
~ h
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